Godly Marriage Principles Every Youth Should Know.
Today there are several alternatives to Godly marriage principles. It is therefore not surprising why the rate of divorce is on the increase. Many people, including Christians, are enduring their marriage instead of enjoying them. Most held onto their marriage vows because of their status in the church and society. Though this group appears to be together outside at home, they are miles apart
.Amazingly, some people in these categories can give dumb folding, soul-lifting teaching, and talk about marriage, but the contrast is their marriage experience in the closet. One wonders why is this happening despite obvious exposure to biblical teaching, better financial base, and high-level education. Failure to live by Godly marriage principles is the singular reason most marriages and homes are in disarray. All other things may change, but God’s principles will not change. God gave us his principles on how to run our lives and Godly marriage principles is one it.
The first marriage recorded in the bible was between Adam and Eve. Then it was God who was both the father and mother-in-law. Therefore, only marriages that are based and founded in God will stand the test of time. However, the youth of this day has replaced these principles with that their political, sport, movies, and music idols personalities and principles.
This more often than not the marriage of these models is a far cry from being a good example to follow. We can address this ugly trend by going back to Godly marriage principles in the bible. But, if you follow these Godly marriage principles it will not only guide you to knowing the will of God for marriage but also know if you are in a wrong relationship.
Every product comes with a user manual. All approved buildings have a plan. The essence of this manual is to ensure you get better service delivery. You can also consult this blueprint whenever this is a malfunctioning to find remedy. There are marriage principles and Godly marriage principles. But if you desire the best in your marriage follow on as we explore Godly marriage principles that guaranteed a blissful home.
1. Build a relationship with your spiritual in-law: Just as we have physical in-law so also we have a spiritual in-law in the person of God. If you are a Christian, God is your in-law. Though Abraham’s servant had no personal encounter with Yahweh, yet he counts on Abraham faith in praying to God for divine direction for finding a suitable wife for Isaac Genesis 26:12-14. God is your spiritual in-law because he is the one who created the person you want to marry.
Why do you need to build a relationship with God? First, because he has a great plan for you Genesis 2:18 Second, He knows, the person you intend to marry more than you do. You’ll agree with me your natural in-law whose son or daughter you’re about to marry know him or her more than you.
So you needed God who knows every mankind, including your would-be spouse. Genesis 6:5 John 2:24. Third, he could fix any challenges that may arise in your marital relationship later only for the asking Matthew 11:28-28.
How do you develop this fellowship? Prayer is one way to develop the relationship with God will both guide you to knowing and applying Godly marriage principles. Eliezer the servant of Abraham prayed. You should pray as you seek God’s face for a partner. Also, as you go into the relationship, still prayer must be your life wire in courtship and marriage.
Another way to get the best from Godly marriage strategies is to read the bible, God’s manual for living including marriage. The word of God contains standard by which Christians live their lives which may not be in tandem with the world’s standard.
God’s desire is that you marry a Christian. Every good parent desires a happy home for his or her children. Abraham was not an exception.
Mind you, following the godly pattern for your marriage, may not be easy at a time as this when youth sees their parents’ Biblical principle as an absurd and obsolete. It’s easier to follow the trend than swimming against the tides. Abraham’s servant also struggles with this in his statement the servant asked him, “What if the woman is unwilling to come back with me to this land? Shall I then take your son back to the country you came from?” But Abraham insisted and even place Eliezer under oath.
This is not the same thing as marriage matchmaking. As you can see, Abraham never mentioned a specific lady. Also, Rebecca’s’ father sought her approver.
Sometimes a relative, a close ally, a pastor or a senior spiritual acquaintance can be the one that will facilitate a marriage relationship between two people. Still, I am not talking about matchmaking here. You may need someone to call your attention to a brother or sister in the fellowship that has your needed qualities.
In Isaac and Rebecca case, it was Abraham’s servant who did the introduction between the duo. And it was Saul who facilitated the marriage between David and Abigail. The middleman does the introduction while both decide what happens thereafter. How it turns out depends on the two of them based on the leading of the Holy Spirit.
Matchmaking is wrong because of the complexity and dynamics of today’s world. What makes it wrong today is the rate of deceitful and false Christians among us (wolves in sheep’s clothing). The other way of saying it is standing as surety or guarantor for a job or loan because you trusted that fellow enough that he or she will not let you down.
Apart from that, it is biblical, and culturally right. After all, some of our fathers, especially the unbelievers were a match made, and they had a fine marriage.
Once again, I do not subscribe to matchmaking. But at best a trusted pastor, friend, parents, colleague, etc can introduce two people to each other. After that, they can pray, discuss, and build the relationship. However, the outcome depends on the two of them without the unsolicited influence of the link person.
Don’t forget God was the first marriage matchmaker, but left the final decision of acceptance or rejection to Adam Genesis 2:20-25.
We should not also forget that the success or otherwise of a marriage whether they are matched made or not depends on God’s grace and the price the couples are ready to pay.
Don’t forget if you are not familiar with God’s voice on other issues you may not recognize his voice on marriage.
2. Build a relationship with others naturally. Every happy marriage started on a natural relationship. Children of God should radiate friendship anywhere you find them. Friendliness apart from being one of the Godly marriage principles, it works in all kinds of relationships. You can’t tell if the person you met in the mall, cab, coffee shop, Gas station, football pitch, saloon etc., would be your husband or wife.
I heard a story about a lady who was going for a job interview. She was harsh and abusive when she had issues with a man on the public bus. She performed brilliantly well in the written and oral interview. But, when they brought in the man to accent to her appointment, it was the man she has insulted hours earlier. Without me telling you the end of the story you know she missed the job.
Abraham’s servant began the relationship with a demand to Rebecca. And she responded cheerfully and in a respectful manner to a total stranger. Unknown to her this stranger will facilitate her marriage to Isaac. Well, she didn’t know one good deed will seal her prayer and expectation on marriage.
In essence, the devil or demons is not behind the marital delay as some youth claim, but their hostile attitude to things and people.
Perhaps what you are doing is complicating your situation and driving away your would-be helpers. For example, whenever you vent your anger, frustration on people around you, you block your chances of connection. You may not need a prayer of deliverance, but attitudinal change to get your desired spouse.
3. Be specific in your choice. If you are sure of what you need, you will know it when you found it. Adam knew his need. He knew something is not just right about his relationship with these beings (animals) in the garden. His statement reveals that and Adam said, this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman because she was taken out of Man Genesis 2:23.
In spite of your choice, you don’t have to be rigid and become a perfectionist. More so, God will give you his best that may not be a hundred percent on your scorecard. That is if you trust him enough.
Abraham’s servant was not mistaken in his choice for his master’s son (Isaac). When Rebecca displayed those attributes the servant didn’t waste time but did the needful. Among Godly marriage, strategies are to be specific about the man or woman you’ll like to marry.
In the encounter between Rebecca and Abraham, servant three principles or virtues appeared. These are basic Godly behavior every child of God should exhibit. They are Spiritual compatibility, hard work, and friendliness.
Apart from the other attributes, the mentioned qualities should be obvious in the man or woman you wish to marry. Let’s check the attributes of Rebecca that reflected the mentioned virtues. One, she welcomes and entertained a total stranger with a smile and courtesy (friendliness and hospitality).
Two, she was willing to serve not only Eliezer but to water all the animals. I hope you realize what it takes to water a single camel, but now ten camels. Note not by a man but a young lady (Industry)
Third, she was willing to follow this complete stranger to a far and unknown land because the man claimed to be Abraham’s servant the progenitor of the Jews (Spiritual compatibility). This shows she has found someone with spiritual compatibility.
Mind you, if she had never learned history and be familiar with her family antecedent she may not know where Eliezer came from. I am amazed at how many youths who do not know the core values of Christianity or the fundamental beliefs of their denomination. No wonder they commit a grievous marital blunder. It will be out of place for a Christian contemplating marrying an unbeliever under whatever guise. Now, much do you know about the Christian faith?
4. Confirm your choice: Among the listed Godly marriage strategies you must not miss is this one. Cultivate the attitude of building intimacy. Usually, one can compromise on a certain area of life, but not God’s standard for marriage. If you hope to enjoy the best in your marriage, you must not omit this. Though I am not an advocate of the long period of courtship, yet I expect you to make the best use of the period no matter how short. This is the courtship period. Courtship period is the time to watch, ask questions, Speak up. The period of courtship is a time for discovery, discussion, and decision.
The first response of Abraham’s servant after making his request to Rebecca was to wait and see if God answered his prayers.
At this time you’re to confirm whether God answered your prayers about your choice of a spouse or not. It is the period to do more of listening than talking. However, it is not the period to be too emotional and sentimental. You should be your real self. Let your partner know your level of compromise.
The following issues must be freely and honestly discussed: financial matters, personal future plans, the number of children, and relationship with extended family members, and service to God, etc.
The world standard is always at variance with the basic Godly marriage principles. Yet the best for your marriage is to follow God’s standard. Marriages fall or stand on these often neglected principles.
How much have you learned through this post to prepare for a blissful marriage? Which area of your life did you need to adjust to fit into this basic Godly marriage principles? Please add any other principle you think I omitted.
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Author: Joseph Akinrinola
Joseph Akinrinola is a Pastor, Sunday school management coach, author, blogger, and a motivational speaker.
Joseph created this blog to help young Christians establish their
feet in Christ, and to provide Biblical time-tested answers to life’s
questions about relationship, christian living and personal development.